Saturday, May 24, 2014

NRA Sets 1,000 Killed In School Shooting As Amount It Would Take For Them To Reconsider Much Of Anything

FAIRFAX, VA—National Rifle Association Executive Vice President and CEO Wayne LaPierre said Monday that somewhere around 1,000 kids would have to die in a school shooting in order for the organization to reconsider their longstanding opposition to gun control.
"Yeah, that's probably the only way we'd reassess much of anything at this point: 1,000 dead kids, shot up pretty good, lying face down in the school auditorium or something like that," LaPierre said, noting that anything less than 1,000 dead kids would not be enough for the NRA to stop urging Congress to pass pro-gun legislation. "I mean, that's just a ballpark number, but I imagine seeing 1,000 or so body bags being wheeled out of a school and a whole town of crying parents would probably make us reflect on our values for at least a little bit."
"So yeah, more or less 1,000 dead kids," LaPierre added. "Something around there. And teachers don't count."

10 comments:

  1. Good job JG, you managed to find someone making sillier commentary than Jon Stewart. Next you'll be posting Alfred E. Neuman.

    http://www.madmagazine.com/blog/2013/02/04/what-was-obama-really-shooting-at

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would put Jon Stewart on a par with the great satirist Jonathan Swift.

      JG was quite apt.

      YOU however are more like Alfred E. Newman.

      Delete
    2. "YOU however are more like Alfred E. Newman."

      What? Me worry?

      Delete
  2. He's the head of the NRA which has more power in Congress than it should given its racist members and jackass statements like this. How stupid does an elected official have to be to support the NRA garbage? How stupid are Americans to support the NRA garbage?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "He's the head of the NRA which has more power in Congress than it should given its racist members and jackass statements like this."

      Anon, are you tracking that the Onion does gag articles? As in he didn't really say that?

      "COLUMBIA, SC—Advising the 1,500 new graduates to “check out this shit,” Vice President Joe Biden reportedly lost control of his rapidly twirling butterfly knife Saturday while delivering the commencement speech at the University of South Carolina. “Son of a bitch,” said Biden as the butterfly knife slipped from his grip, pinwheeled across the stage, and slid beneath the provost’s seat. “Sorry, everybody. That never happens. Man, I had it going awesome earlier, but I’m sweatin’ balls up here. Damn, that fucker’s sharp as hell.” Biden, who sources confirmed appeared to be slurping blood from a small wound on his hand, continued the commencement address by heavily quoting from the Whitesnake song “Slide It In.”
      http://www.theonion.com/articles/biden-loses-control-of-butterfly-knife-during-comm,36053/

      Delete
    2. The point is, why is this so believable? Because of the real unbelievable BS that comes from the NRA leaders constantly. Why do you follow and support the racist Ted Nugent? Is not his real garbage even sicker than this made up garbage? Then you think it's cleaver to make up a similar fake story about Biden. Biden is not spreading racist hatred like your NRA leaders are.

      Delete
    3. "Then you think it's cleaver to make up a similar fake story about Biden. Biden is not spreading racist hatred like your NRA leaders are."

      Anon, if you would look at the link I cited, you'd see that it came from the same site as the original posting. Interesting how you find one story believable, and one in poor taste. Yet both are from the same site that parodies both sides.

      Delete
    4. Again, you miss the point. Parodies aside, your side is full of real statements of racist hate, the other side is not. It's in bad taste to make fun of racial hate, but at least it has a kernel of truth to it.

      Delete
    5. I thought the Onion piece was pretty funny in that almost-credible kinda parody they do so well.

      Delete