One glance confirmed his suspicions. Behind a bush, on the side of the road, there was no severed arm. No dismembered trunk of a man in his late fifties. No dead, decmoposing, nude body of a teenage prostitute. No signs of any illicit substances. No head in a bag. No illegal gambling operation. No child pornography. Nothing. Not a sausage. The area was absolutely devoid of any criminal activity. For Detective Sergeant Jones, this was not to be the start of any trail of events which would not, in no time at all, involve him in neither a tangled knot of suspicion, nor any web of lies, which would, had he been not involved, surely have led him to no other place, than the central criminal court of the Old Bailey.Worse, there was no gun to be found! Nothing that looked like a firearm was anywhere in the vicinity!
Showing posts with label monty python. Show all posts
Showing posts with label monty python. Show all posts
Friday, December 9, 2011
A crime scene where no crime occurred!
I'm sorry but something MAgunowner said reminded me of this from Monty Python (Which I have augmented):
Thursday, December 8, 2011
I'm sorry, but I have to repost this....
Monty Python's "The Idiot in Society":
Someplace such as the Faculty of Idiocy at the University of East Anglia is the only place I can imagine this person receiving an education. Of course, the village idiot is a part of the old village system, and as such has a vital role to play in a modern rural society, because there is this very real need in society for someone whom almost anyone can look down on and ridicule. And this is the role that this person and members of his family have fulfilled in his village for the past four hundred years.
Unfortunately, I can't see this person having lucid moments: he's a full time idiot. Although the post that provoked this one had me thinking of this idiot being a lecturer in idiocy: something he's well qualified.
It's nice to know that after three years of study this idiot received a diploma of idiocy, a handful of mud and a kick on the head.
He is still a glutton for punishment which is why he enjoys making idiotic comments on people's blogs.
Someplace such as the Faculty of Idiocy at the University of East Anglia is the only place I can imagine this person receiving an education. Of course, the village idiot is a part of the old village system, and as such has a vital role to play in a modern rural society, because there is this very real need in society for someone whom almost anyone can look down on and ridicule. And this is the role that this person and members of his family have fulfilled in his village for the past four hundred years.
Unfortunately, I can't see this person having lucid moments: he's a full time idiot. Although the post that provoked this one had me thinking of this idiot being a lecturer in idiocy: something he's well qualified.
It's nice to know that after three years of study this idiot received a diploma of idiocy, a handful of mud and a kick on the head.
He is still a glutton for punishment which is why he enjoys making idiotic comments on people's blogs.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Rick Perry Meets the Spanish Inquisition
OK, Rick Perry's latest gaff in Detroit reminded me of Monty Python's Spanish Inquisition sketch:
I was curious if anyone else had the same reaction and came up with this:
Of course, life imitates art, but there could be a better script than the one in the above video:
I was curious if anyone else had the same reaction and came up with this:
Of course, life imitates art, but there could be a better script than the one in the above video:
NOBODY expects Rick Perry! The chief Agency I will dismantle is Commerce...Commerce and Education...Commerce and Education.... The two Agencies I will dismantle are Commerce and Education...and The EPA.... .The three Agencies I will dismantle are Commerce, Education, and The EPA ...and The Department of Energy.... The four...no... Amongst the Agencies I will dismantle.... Amongst Agencies I will dismantle...are Commerce, Education.... I'll come in again.Dominic Dezzutti also had the same observation.
NOBODY expects expects Rick Perry! Amongst the Agencies I will dismantle are such diverse ones as: Commerce, Education, The EPA, and The Department of Energy, and Housing and Urban Development - Oh damn!
Monday, September 19, 2011
Terry Jones' 'If fish can feel pain, then maybe Iraqi children can, too'
Terry Jones, of Monty Python fame, wrote this really good editorial about realising that humans have feelings as well.
By Terry Jones (yes, the Python, not the asshole US preacher)
The Observer, Saturday 3 May 2003 20.59 EDT
The recent report by the Royal Society suggesting that fish can feel pain will come as a severe blow to all those anglers who have hitherto operated on the principle that fish are incapable of feeling anything. It comes as an even bigger shock to those of us who have for so long applied the same principle to human beings.
If fish can feel pain, does this mean that a 13-year-old child, picked up in Afghanistan, hooded, flown several thousand miles to Cuba and kept in a chicken coop, may also experience physical sensations bordering on the uncomfortable?
Like Tony Blair, I thought the Guantanamo Bay camp was 'an unsatisfactory situation', but it never occurred to me that the human beings in there would be capable of feeling discomfort.
In much the same way, I suppose, George Bush must have assumed that all those prisoners on death row, whose death sentences he signed as Governor, would never undergo distress at the prospect of imminent death. Like him I always firmly believed that human beings were incapable of feeling any unpleasantness.
Otherwise, I used to point out, why would civilised people like Donald Rumsfeld even contemplate dropping cluster bombs all over the Middle East where kids will pick them up or tread on them and get blown to pieces or have their legs ripped off? If fish can feel, there must be a strong possibility that small Iraqi children will be unhappy at losing bits of their bodies.
If fish can feel, perhaps we should rethink some of our other policies. I mean maybe it's not such a good idea to dump mentally ill people on the streets in the hope that some passers-by will give them 'community care'? Just suppose that - like fish - the mentally ill can feel miserable?
At least there is no suggestion that fish suffer from the cold and wet, so there's no problem in leaving the mentally ill out on the streets through the winter, but that's not the point. The point is that we ought to re-examine some of our long-held and most cherished assumptions.
Like, for example, the idea that being out of work is just something that happens to some schmucks but has no bearing on their quotient of personal contentment. If fish can feel, maybe George Bush should be more worried about the US unemployment rate reaching 6 per cent than about how fabulous it is that his military can drop so many bombs and fire off so many missiles in such a short time.
If fish can feel, perhaps Tony Blair should reconsider his support for a US administration that is publicly pledged to visiting war and destruction on any other country that dares to oppose them.
If fish can feel, perhaps we ought not to allow the men and women who currently run the White House to run the world in the way that they clearly intend.
If fish can feel pain, perhaps it's time to govern human affairs on the principle that human beings feel pain too.
Seel also:
By Terry Jones (yes, the Python, not the asshole US preacher)
The Observer, Saturday 3 May 2003 20.59 EDT
The recent report by the Royal Society suggesting that fish can feel pain will come as a severe blow to all those anglers who have hitherto operated on the principle that fish are incapable of feeling anything. It comes as an even bigger shock to those of us who have for so long applied the same principle to human beings.
If fish can feel pain, does this mean that a 13-year-old child, picked up in Afghanistan, hooded, flown several thousand miles to Cuba and kept in a chicken coop, may also experience physical sensations bordering on the uncomfortable?
Like Tony Blair, I thought the Guantanamo Bay camp was 'an unsatisfactory situation', but it never occurred to me that the human beings in there would be capable of feeling discomfort.
In much the same way, I suppose, George Bush must have assumed that all those prisoners on death row, whose death sentences he signed as Governor, would never undergo distress at the prospect of imminent death. Like him I always firmly believed that human beings were incapable of feeling any unpleasantness.
Otherwise, I used to point out, why would civilised people like Donald Rumsfeld even contemplate dropping cluster bombs all over the Middle East where kids will pick them up or tread on them and get blown to pieces or have their legs ripped off? If fish can feel, there must be a strong possibility that small Iraqi children will be unhappy at losing bits of their bodies.
If fish can feel, perhaps we should rethink some of our other policies. I mean maybe it's not such a good idea to dump mentally ill people on the streets in the hope that some passers-by will give them 'community care'? Just suppose that - like fish - the mentally ill can feel miserable?
At least there is no suggestion that fish suffer from the cold and wet, so there's no problem in leaving the mentally ill out on the streets through the winter, but that's not the point. The point is that we ought to re-examine some of our long-held and most cherished assumptions.
Like, for example, the idea that being out of work is just something that happens to some schmucks but has no bearing on their quotient of personal contentment. If fish can feel, maybe George Bush should be more worried about the US unemployment rate reaching 6 per cent than about how fabulous it is that his military can drop so many bombs and fire off so many missiles in such a short time.
If fish can feel, perhaps Tony Blair should reconsider his support for a US administration that is publicly pledged to visiting war and destruction on any other country that dares to oppose them.
If fish can feel, perhaps we ought not to allow the men and women who currently run the White House to run the world in the way that they clearly intend.
If fish can feel pain, perhaps it's time to govern human affairs on the principle that human beings feel pain too.
Seel also:
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
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