Friday, August 19, 2011

Registration of Guns and Licensing of Gun Owners from the Alien Perspective


Aliens from a distant galaxy were approaching our solar system. Identifying Earth as the only habitable planet, they came for a closer look. One of the first things they noticed from a great distance was the air traffic and high-speed train movement. Realizing these were conveyances for moving people, they marvelled at the efficiency and complete lack of collisions and near-collisions. The coordination was impressive.

Coming a bit closer they began seeing the cars. Unlike the larger means of transportation, these seemed to be involved in countless mishaps and explosions. Everywhere they looked cars were running into each other and into other objects. The death and destruction was incalculable.

One alien said to the other, since these primitive vehicles are operated by humans, why don't they assign a numerical designation to each one which could be linked to the operator. This way they could easily identify the ones causing all the trouble.

The other alien, scanning the highly-advanced computer system, said, it seems they already have done this. Perhaps it means the quantity of problems has already been reduced to the level we observe.

Coming still closer, but maintaining a distant orbit, they began to observe another phenomenon: gunshots. They recognized these as primitive projectile-ejecting weapons. With each blast their computers registered the event. They watched horrified and amazed that a civilization advanced enough to register all cars and license all car-drivers would allow this.

Wouldn't registering those guns and tying them to the users the way they've done with cars eliminate much of the damage, asked the first alien.

The other more senior crew member said sadly it's time to return and make our report.

14 comments:

  1. There are retarded aliens?

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  2. They're called, Jugeared Obama-tards from Uranus.

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  3. Yup, TB, if they are able to come to us, not us go to them, then by all means let us hope to become as 'tarded' as they are.

    Did you not get the Palin memo that you uneducated bigots on the right are not supposed to use that word because it offends her due to the term being applied to her Down Syndrome child?

    "Yup!" is apparently incapable of using better English, which raises the spectre of him being deficient in linguistic intelligence.

    Or maybe Terran English - in this case proper British - may be foreign to him; perhaps he is a turd person from another Rightie's alternate reality's bum.

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  4. Did you not get the Palin memo that you uneducated bigots on the right are not supposed to use that word because it offends her due to the term being applied to her Down Syndrome child?

    You're right I should have in no way demeaned Trig by comparing him to that jug eared-retarded-marxist-douche-bag, B.H.Obamba.....

    I am truly sorry for that comparison, Trig is truly wonderful person who is growing and learning and becoming a productive member of society......


    Obambmutard, not so much.

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  5. Damn wrote:"Trig is truly wonderful person who is growing and learning and becoming a productive member of society"

    Trig is a child, a blessing and a unique challenge for his family. But the reality is that Trig is to some degree, as a result of the chromosomal mutation that causes his condition, intellectually impaired. Because of his condition, he is likely to have a range of health problems as well, and a shortened life expectancy. If he lives to 40, he has a very high probability of suffering from dementia at that age, similar to Alzheimer's.

    Because clearly, in your eyes, a child who has done nothing, and likely will do nothing, but is white and right-wing (so far), is inherently better than a man who went through college, and law school, with honors, and distinction. And then went on to have an inspiring career as an attorney and law professor, activist, state legislator, senator and then a President who refurbished our tarnished reputation in the world?

    Your values are wacked, your objectivity and capacity for objectivity and fairness are non-existent.

    You are clearly one of those who live in the false reality of extreme righty ideology rather than in the real world of facts. Facts that you don't happen to like, not because they are bad things, but because they don't fit your preconceptions and unfounded prejudices and fears.

    What color is the sky on your planet? Hallucinate much, do you?

    Do you know what your amygdala is, where it is, and what it does? No? Well, the above explains why yours is almost certainly badly deformed.

    I'm convinced that there are three people in this world smarter than you are, Damn, and that two of us are also better educated than you are, and the third could be easily. One is President Obama, one is me, and the third is Trig.

    It is not surprising that you would praise the non-existant accomplishments and fictional attributes of Trig, while trying to deny those of Obama; because you and your fellow partisans ARE yourselves so antagonistic and fearful of intellect.

    Try embracing a life of fact and reality, Damn. "Know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

    Are you literate enough to recognize the quotation, Damn? John 8:32

    If you had someone to offer in competition with Obama, who had legitimately comparable credentials, you wouldn't have to try so hard to tear down another person's accomplishments, to make yourself feel better. Instead you celebrate and exalt mediocrity and impairment, trying to deceive yourself that it is something else.

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  6. Actually those are the folks from Talos IV, called the Talosians. Everyone too young to have had the pleasure, should watch Star Trek, The Original Series, it's the basis for everything we know today.

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  7. Because clearly, in your eyes, a child who has done nothing, and likely will do nothing,(wow, just like Obama) but is white and right-wing (so far),(again wow, you are a liberal douche-bag) is inherently better than a man who went through college,(but won't release his grades or papers) and law school,(again, no papers) with honors, and distinction. (bitch please, there are people that were supposed to be in the same classes with him that cannot remember him ever being in class)

    And then went on to have an inspiring career as an attorney and law professor, activist, state legislator, senator (wig whoop, he voted present more times than any other senator during his time in office) and then a President who refurbished our tarnished reputation in the world?

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  8. Yes Laci, it is pretty bad when you have the older, primitive parts of the limbic system, like the amygdala are deformed, AND there are problems with his cerebral function as well in Anon under his various blognomen.

    I'm speculating here that deformed amygdala has no understanding of the significance of his abnormality.

    There is no requirement for Obama to release his papers; Perry certainly didn't do himself any favors when his grades came out.

    Perhaps these right wing asses are unaware that the editor of the law review - like Obama - are only selected from the honor students - cum laude means with honor. Obama graduated from Harvard Law, magna cum laude, meaning with high honors. Obama was first editor - his very first year in law school - and then president of the law review his second year, two separate distinctions. Harvard Law is the oldest continuously operating law school in the country, has graduated more supreme court justices than any other school, among other distinctions, is consistently ranked in the top 10 law schools in the country. Then he went on to teach as at another of the top (T-14)law school as a professor.

    He has also written three books, which he actually wrote himself, unlike Sarah Palin, who simply put her name on books written by someone else. (Trig has a chromosomal abnormality that is the cause of his low intellect; what is his mother's excuse?)

    Deformed amygdala then wrote: "there are people that were supposed to be in the same classes with him that cannot remember him ever being in class." Did these people you refer to then release THEIR papers and grades to prove they were there and in attendance?
    Did THEIR names appear on the Harvard Law Review publications?

    Perhaps you are unaware, deformed amygdala, that one of the criticisms of Harvard Law is that their first year class size is too large? I'm guessing you were not aware of this explanation for one person not having seen another in classes at Harvard Law.

    Or, your sources are lying, because lets face it - the right doesn't have a very good track record with making accurate or fair accusations. Would you like me to document some of those? I have an impressive list; it includes almost any statement made by Rush Limbaugh, statements which are consistently, chronically distorted or factually inaccurate. Ditto Faux News, and other right wing media sources.

    Let's leave it that you should seriously multisource verify some of what you appear to believe, beginning with fact check sources.

    I'm guessing deformed amygdala also is unaware of how bad the attendance was of some of their 'heroes' like Michele Bachmann, who has missed 40% of the votes in Congress and has the worst attendance record of the MN representatives to Congress.

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  9. As to Trig? I doubt that deformed amydgala would be so respectful of that particular child if his mother was not the popsie half-term governor and all around religious crazy and ignoramus Sarah Palin.

    (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEBnZJQZHJg)

    I think if it were not for his perception that Trig was going to grow up with the same prejudices, as a nice whitey righty ignoramus, he would be making the nastiest possible comments about his chromosomal abnormality and its side effects.

    And be on notice deformed amygdala, IF you refer to me as a bitch again, I will delete it. That is as offensive as nigger would be to a black person. Do without the sexist remarks in expressing yourself, or don't express yourself at all. This doesn't exclusively apply to me, it applies to addressing any female commenter here.

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  10. Bill Ayres: Ghost writer.....August 21, 2011 at 5:55 AM

    There is no requirement for Obama to release his papers; Perry certainly didn't do himself any favors when his grades came out.

    I'll take his grades and TEXAS' Economy: The state's payrolls have risen 2.9% since the end of the recession, third behind North Dakota and Alaska and far outpacing the USA's 0.4% growth, according to the BLS. Also, Texas' 8.2% unemployment rate is well below the nation's 9.2%.

    And Obama knows that the release of his grades will do him no favors either, showing his C student transcripts will just prove it...... you know he won't release them to prove otherwise....

    I'm guessing deformed amygdala also is unaware of how bad the attendance was of some of their 'heroes' like Michele Bachmann, who has missed 40% of the votes (while running for office: love the selective editing.) in Congress and has the worst attendance record of the MN representatives to Congress.

    That means she is on the record for missing half as many votes as Mr O'whatwasIelectedforbama, missing a stellar 80% of his votes the same amount of time.

    Obama has also missed votes on a Democratic priority, the expansion of the federally funded State Children's Health Insurance Program (SCHIP) as well as a vote on a resolution that condemned MoveOn.org for running an ad in the New York Times attacking the top general in Iraq, Gen. David Petraeus.

    http://articles.cnn.com/2007-11-02/politics/obama.missed.votes_1_obama-spokesman-bill-burton-iranian-revolutionary-guard-rothenberg-political-report?_s=PM:POLITICS

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  11. Not selective editing ghost-brain; Bachmann was missing more than 25% of her votes AND committee meetings before she started running for president, and she 'started' a long time before she announced. Devil, meet your details.

    As to the Texas economy, again teh devil is in the details. The job growth is almost entirely due to population, and the state is highest in the country for minimum wage jobs. Further, the growth in jobs ties directly to the federal and stimulus jobs, not a damn thing that Perry did. In fact the unemployment went UP in Texas, and would have gone up more if it were not for the same thing which worked well for North Dakota - oil jobs. Perry is a crappy governor, not well liked in Texas because he does a bad job.

    Like Texas under his admin is:
    49th in teacher pay;
    1st in the percentage of people over 25 without a high school diploma;
    41st in high school graduation rate;
    46th in SAT scores;
    1st in percentage of uninsured children;
    in percentage of people living below the poverty level;
    1st in teenage birth rate, (those are unintended pregnancies, btw) And repeat unintended teen pregnancies;
    50th in average credit scores for loan applicants (do you know how hard it is to be WORSE in stats like these than usually dead-last 3rd world country-ish Mississippi?);
    1st in air pollution emissions;
    1st in volume of volatile organic compounds released into the air;
    1st in amount of toxic chemicals released into water;
    1st in amount of recognized cancer-cau­sing carcinogen­s;
    1st in amount of carbon dioxide emissions;
    50th in homeowners­' insurance affordabil­ity;
    50th in percentage of voting age population that votes
    1st in annual number of executions;
    49th in mental health funding;
    1st in minimum wage jobs

    You should do better research, not just cherrypick. What is going well in Texas is NOT because of anything Perry has ever done. He takes credit for things for which he does not deserve credit. He - and his supporters - conveniently don't tell people like you, the low information voters who don't fact check, the rest of the story, the WHOLE story.

    I, on the other hand, take a great deal of pride in the thoroughness and objectivity of my research. Texas has one of the greatest gaps between the extreme wealth of a very few, the top percent or two, with a majority of Texans on the poor side of that gap. The last thing we want, the worst thing that could happen to this country is to be at all like Texas.

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  12. Don't take my word for it about the widening gap in wealth and income.
    For example
    :
    "A 2006 study entitled Pulling Apart: A State-by-State Analysis of Income Trends, produced by the Center for Budget and Policy Priorities and the Economic Policy Institute (CBPP and EPI), shows that Texas ranked at or near the top among the fifty states in terms of income inequality in the early 2000s. The CBPP-EPI study concluded that in the early 2000s, the income gap between the richest 20 percent of families and the poorest 20 percent in Texas was the second largest in the nation. The income gap between the richest 20 percent of families and the middle 20 percent was the largest in the nation. Worsening income distribution has been a trend throughout the country for some time, but the trend is pronounced in Texas in part due to the historical resistance in the political culture to helping the poor and less fortunate by providing government support in the form of social services, and the pattern of business access to the legislative process."
    By the term 'business access to the legislative process', he means the ability of wealth to buy government favors, looking the other way, etc.

    What I call corruption.

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  13. I don't mind cooperating with the hijacking of the thread in order to discuss the new topic, but at some point I'd like to see us return to the original point. From the alien perspective it's strange that we can licence drivers and vehicles and not gun owners and guns.

    I agree with that. Who am I to doubt the Talosian brain?

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