Friday, August 5, 2011

The Slap Hat Self Defense System



This standard baseball cap is one the most simple, least noticeable, and efficient personal defense items on the market. The secret of this hat is a pocket of unique impact material that is 100% the density of lead and which is sewn into the cap. Simply use the bill as the handle and the cap becomes an instant impact weapon to be used against a threat. Simple, fast, and effective! The cap includes Velcro adjustment to fit all sizes.
I'm gettin' one for Farago's birthday. Does anyone know when that is?

14 comments:

  1. MikeB, why do you advocate criminal activity? I didn't realize you were a promoter of illegally carrying a concealed weapon? That is what you could be charged with for wearing this hat in public in a number of states.

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  2. I think this hat could be considered more passive defense than a weapon, so long as the use for self-defense is secondary to any other use.

    To call this a weapon is like saying the steel inside a stilleto heel on a pair of my favorite pumps is a weapon, if I use it in self-defense to jab it into the instep of someone who attempts to harm me physically. Or similarly wacking someone with a heavily filled handbag who is threatens me. Or jab someone who is attacking me with an old fashioned hat pin.

    I'm confident that despite all of the self-defense courses which advocate things like that, wearing those shoes, or using my purse proactively in my own defense, won't put me in violation of the statute cited in the moron's comment. FWM, I think you would have a very difficult time including this stupid item under the concealed weapon laws. Why don't you go check those statutes, and then get back to us with the specific sections which apply to hats.

    Despite the name, it is a shoe, not a stilleto dagger.

    I doubt the damn hat does what it is promoted to do; mostly swishing your hat around in that matter is just silly. Maybe an attacker would injure themselves laughing?

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  3. Fat White Man: “I didn't realize you were a promoter of illegally carrying a concealed weapon?”

    I think this falls under open carry. Or maybe the weapon part is considered concealed in the hat…

    Dog gone, when something is manufactured as a weapon it is treated different than using a purse or heel as a weapon. If you fastened blades to a stiletto heel it is considered a weapon, like sewing special material into a hat. Remember how gun control advocates keep telling us that the difference between cars and guns is that guns are designed to kill?

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  4. Care to test that theory?August 5, 2011 at 8:30 PM

    I doubt the damn hat does what it is promoted to do; mostly swishing your hat around in that matter is just silly. Maybe an attacker would injure themselves laughing?

    Want to take a blow to the kisser from one of these.... the thing weighs 1.8 lbs.....

    And it is still a sap under law.....

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  5. Theoretically flawed wrot:
    "Want to take a blow to the kisser from one of these.... the thing weighs 1.8 lbs.....

    And it is still a sap under law..... "

    By your definition, if I clobber someone with a 5 lb bag of cat litter or dog food, or my purse, they are saps.

    I am arguing that this sales pitch not withstanding, I don't think this will pass the legal test of being a sap.

    I don't think it will do well as a hat either because of the weight, LOL, which is part of what makes it so funny and so freaking useless. I think you could also make the case that despite the overall weight, the distribution of that weight makes it critically different, including ineffective, from the other items described in the statute. TOO dissimilar.

    By that too loose definition, I would be carrying some sort of knuckle weapon, when I grip my key ring in the palm of my fist, and have my keys sticking out between my fingers for possible self-defense, when I approach my car alone late at night. Which I suspect would be far more slf-defensively effective than this ridiculous hat.

    Stilleto heels are uncomfortable enough to wear; but this hat would be worse. It is a joke, a stupid stupid invention. To try to class it as a sap.........well, using a different definition of the word, that makes YOU the sap, LOL!

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  6. Another very key part of the wording I note here in the statute offered by our effing Moron, is
    (a) A person commits the offense of unlawful use of weapons:

    I'm pretty sure that wearing that hat would be considered lawful use, so long as you did not OFFENSIVELY attack someone wtih it, and only used it in the secondary use for defensive purposes. Because wearing it AS a hat is not an unlawful use, nor use as a weapon.

    Sadly, Laci is out of circulation here for the weekend. He has plenty of practical experience with how courts define unlawful weapons and their unlawful use, from both sides - prosecution and defense.

    I'll drop him an email, but don't expect he'll see it before Sunday night / Monday morning.

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  7. Besides it being a head worn black jack,.. its a fucking ancient trick. My grandad (born 1902 dead in 1987) mentioned sewing pennies into the back of his hat back in the day. As kids, we thought this sounded great. We sewed nickels (heavier than pennies) into the backs of our ball caps in middle school and high school.

    Many a fight was ended quickly. Many a trip to the Doc for stitches followed.

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  8. selective editing much.....August 5, 2011 at 10:27 PM

    I'm pretty sure that wearing that hat would be considered lawful use, so long as you did not OFFENSIVELY attack someone wtih it, and only used it in the secondary use for defensive purposes. Because wearing it AS a hat is not an unlawful use, nor use as a weapon.

    "Simply use the bill as the handle and the cap becomes an instant impact weapon to be used against a threat.

    You get arested with wearing a "Slap-HAT", and

    And try to worm your way out of it by claiming that it was just a hat your honor....when the law says

    (a) A person commits the offense of unlawful use of weapons
    when he knowingly:


    ....again if you bought a hat with a lead weight in the cap..... how could you say, "I didn't know that 20oz lead weight was there your honor...."

    (1) Sells, manufactures, purchases, possesses or
    carries
    any bludgeon, black-jack, slung-shot, sand-club,
    sand-bag, metal knuckles or other knuckle weapon
    regardless of its composition,


    Do you have a profound lack of reading comprehension, or are you just that obtuse.

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  9. "I think this hat could be considered more passive defense than a weapon, so long as the use for self-defense is secondary to any other use."

    I sure wouldn't bet my freedom on your questionable legal advice.

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  10. It was just a joke. But on the other hand it might protect against these.

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  11. LOL, I recognized it as a joke and me and the missus got a good laugh.
    Thanks

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  12. Mikeb302000:

    Why is it that so many of your brave and manly gunzloonz detractors feel the need to be anonymice when they be talkin' trash to you or dog gone? I mean I know they're all brave killerists but maybe they're afeared that you're just trying to lure them in so that they'll identify themselves and be easy (but vewy,vewy, deadly) targets for the stiletto heeled jackbootists of the Obamagunzconfiscators. Obviously they've forgotten that everytime they comment here their IP address is collected by your server and stored for its eventual use during the gunzconfiscation raids!!

    ReplyDelete
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